Monday, May 31, 2010

Idioms and songs

This past weekend I karaoked for a friends birthday party. It was a lot of fun but I have been thinking how if I actually listen to lyrics they speak to me. I have always been good at memorizing quotes from books that I read but I don't read much anymore b/c I detach myself from this world when I read and I have to think and process a lot so I cannot enter dreamland that often or else I cannot return. I have wanted to memorize the word but honestly have not been disciplined enough. I am going through a lot of transitions and would like you to uplift them. I will have different colleagues next year and a lot of my friends are moving from here. I think the hardest part about the life I live is feeling lonely. Here are a few songs that have spoke to me....

"there can be miracles when you believe..." -I believe the Father will work out everything though I cannot see the end I know it is there

"everyone needs a helping hand take a look at your fellow man, tell me what can i do today?"- Everyone you meet is fighting some sort of battle. We are never alone. We are all human.

"The Father is great, but sometimes life aint good when I pray things dont always turn out like I think they should but I do it anyway, I do it anyway." - Sometimes all we can do is pray and that has to be enough for us b/c ultimately we are not in charge.

"Deliver me from my prideful mind, it grows heavier on me all the time..... Break my heart just like Davids was with a weeping grepped widow in my house....What a sad and such a deadly cry to think that I own my own life......how can I deny my brother when I killed your only begotten son help me to love another you are the only King.- Deliver me from myself, sometimes I am my own worst enemy.

"Aint nobody aint nobody love me like Jesus aint nobody aint nobody love me like the Lord aint nobody aint nobody love me like Jesus he's my friend!"- when the whole world seems to cave in on me his hands swoop under me like the wings of an eagle and shelter me.

"I raise my hands I bow my head, I'm finding more and more truth to the words printed in red they tell me that there is more to life than I can see...I BELIEVE." -The Father is good and life is not based on how I feel but a relationship with the red lettered man.

"Even the King cries, when an angels hands are tied." - I might be sad but then again so is the King. He loves me!

"If your going through hell keep on going don't stop now if your scared don't show it you might get out before the devil even knows your there."-sometimes life seems bad but really it is nothing compared to the sufferings of the Father.

I also tend to like all kinds of songs b/c they remind me of many things but mainly that "there is nothing new under the sun " even living in Laos I recently found that they have some of the same idioms through a talk with a teacher at the language school. Can you match these to their English equivalent?

"The customer is God."

"The subject you study is men or women at University" so this one doesn't directly translate right so basically in English "They went to college to get their MR(S) degree."

"Change with current events"

hmm....or just songs to dance to..you take your pick. I chose a few that were an encouragement to me but please lift up my transitions, loneliness and friendships. I love you all! Whoever might be reading!

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Things

So tonight I learned that two precious things to me had been stolen but as I recalled about a year ago when someone tried to steal my motorbike and at first I acted in anger. My father was quick to remind me that it was just a thing and I have something no one can ever take away from me. Dont worry I still have my motorbike but my soul is down.

I had had the last straw of a long weekend and it was only halfway over. I called my mother crying and the call got dropped. Thankfully by the time it dropped I wasnt so hysterical. I love my mom as I chatted with her for the 10 to 15 minutes at first she tried to make everything better. Then I broke out "Mom, Im okay Im just sad and it is ok to be sad!" She said "Im sorry you are absolutely right."

You see why do we fight feeling so much. If I am sad so is the father but we do have feelings. Recognizing them is half the battle, knowing the way to act that best glorifies the father the other.

Oddly enough, my friend L called me who recently met our master about 2-3 weeks ago but I was talking to my roommate telling her my horrifying news as she talked on Skype with her sister. I quickly called her back but she was asleep. You see she had woken up, had a dream that I was really sad and called me. I told her what had happened and that my heart was sad but I was okay the master was helping me deal with my pain. She was in that in between sleep and awake stage and didnt say much.

I later realized that the master is truly amazing and through my interaction with her although I did not really say anything I believe her decision to follow after him even more was confirmed. I am thankful that the father used my sadness to bring him glory even though I never really said anything but that I was sad and would be ok. It also lifted my heart a bit for in my weakness I saw him made strong.

As school approaches on Monday I am tempted to lock myself in my room and not come out all day tomorrow. I dont know if I can handle another disappointment, failure or whatever you want to call it. (We'll grading students papers doesnt count a project none of them took seriously but I am excited to see their progress!) It has been a long week and on top of the physical challenges I feel very emotionally challenged.

Please lift up that the father would give me strength of faith so that I remember he is near and "all good things work together for the good of those who love him."I may not know his plan but I know he has one. Please ask that I will not live in fear as the world desires but face it with the knowledge and truth that true love suffices and all good things succumbs to it. Thanks friends!