Sunday, February 3, 2013

What Trusting in Sovereignty Looks Like to a Grad Student

   Last night I heard a really great message on sharing the good news to the world. It is comforting to know that while my heart is not always here. I am where I am suppose to be for now.  A reminder that we should feel for all kinds of people and love them but sometimes that means in our own backyard (work, friends and family). Graduate school is tough but I never thought it would be easy I just didn't realize how much I would have to learn to learn or feel alone sometimes.

 So many times I've had to change my expectations and nights with little sleep don't help. I keep reminding myself that it will be worth it in the end. I've loved all the students I taught and in my Masters that hasn't changed! While there is a lot of change all the time the Lord remains constant. He came to bring chaos so that we could truly understand his peace in a fallen world. We are the ends of the earth and His Word needs to be brought back to Jerusalem was a key part of the speech. A reminder that this world is not all about me but how he can use me. May I have a Heavenly perspective and not an Earthly one!

I am thankful for a heart for the world but even more a heart for people. I struggle under demands and expectations and I cannot please everyone but how do I let my heart let go of these earthly desires and rest in the Sovereignty of my Father? I believe it is through striving to love Him first and praying for the strength that He alone can give me. Phil. 4:12-13. He's been there before. Yeah, maybe not writing technical papers or trying to figure out graphs, but he has felt those same frustrations growing up as He harnessed new skills and He understands my pain and sorrow Eccl. 1:7-8. He has tried and tried at things until finally He figured them out or someone showed enough courage to care for a carpenter.

 As I enter these next few months I cling to Him and Him alone. Please be praying for favor with all those I am under, that I would be able to complete all my work to par, on time and with excellence and first and foremost I would put Him first so that through the life I lead, no matter the pain, loneliness or frustration would be a light of His love to others. Thank you! May your day be blessed with the assurance that He is Sovereign. We don't have to be in control or even understand His plan we just need to give Him the reigns and trust Him as he guides us through the muddy marshes, slippery rivers, and rocky terrains.