Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Directions-hmm...directions

Wow! It is crazy to think that in 11 days I head back to Laos which has become my new home. I miss my friends there so much but know that I will miss those in the states once I return.

One thing I have realized recently is that any sort of change makes me nervous. I thought it was only doing things for the first time but anytime I enter the unknown a wave of butterflies come passing through my stomach. I know the father will provide and my time home has been such a confirmation of that so then why do I still have fear in my heart? Because I am human and that is one of the many quirks that comes along with the way the Father made me.

So this week I have been raising funds to go back to Laos on and driving a lot to visit people in the Oklahoma area. Well, thankfully I haven't gotten too turned around yet. I went from Arkansas to Edmond(3 1/2 -4 hours)-stayed there two days, Edmond to Tulsa(1 1/2 hours towards Arkansas) and then Friday I go to Guthrie(1 1/2 hours back towards Norman and drive 4 hours home). I tell you all this for a reason.

As most of you know my sense of direction is slim. Today I took the wrong exit to Tulsa and got a little turned around. Of course on my attempt to turn back west I went further East. I then stopped at a gas station and asked for directions. One person told me turn left on this road and go till you cross the bridge then turn right after the McDonald's. Well, the other guy in the store said the same thing except turn left after the McDonald's.They also had told me there was another gas station next to the McDonald's. I had decided I would just ask there if I needed to well neither one of them were right. The exit was before the bridge and I saw my brothers apartment complex and made it with only about a 10 minute detour.

Sometimes life is like driving on an unfamiliar bypass and you don't know what exits you might take or where they will lead you but you do know that eventually they will connect. Someone once said "All roads lead to Rome" well, I think they should have said "All roads lead to the Father if seeking truth." We all want answers but I am surprisingly learning to be okay with the not having them. Its a life long battle. I may never like change but I have to accept it. Oddly, I think that the Father gave me no sense of direction so that in bigger matters I could be okay with not knowing the answer. I always used to worry about following Path A or B and now as my mother once taught me it doesn't matter in the end He will always bring us back onto the road of His will.

Some things to be thinking about

That my brother and I would have a good two days together

That I wouldnt accidently go to Joplin on my way home Friday(yes, it has happened before and and sadly more than once) b/c without getting lost I'll make it home at midnight having traveled a total of 9 1/2 hours in one day.(Stamina and safety)

That I could get everything together and be at peace it is out of my hands

For the rest of my support and visas when I get there( I guess mostly though to be at peace there are so many things I could write but someday I'll learn to relax.)

Thanks for reading!

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